I often wonder if it is ok to be this stressed, tired. I am taking this as my opportunity to vent. I think I'm frequently misunderstood, ever since I had Emmett and Liam I have been more and more aware of what I am saying, and increasingly paranoid about what others think of me.
I used to be confident in my decisions, now, not so much. I think that comes with being a mother of a Special Needs child. People keep throwing about words like mother's intuition. But what does that really mean? We took Emmett seriously every time he said his head hurt (he'd point to the shunt), and every time he'd end up getting yet another MRI, with results stating everything was clear in his shunt.
He uses his shunt as a crutch, and he's only 3.5 years old. How are we supposed to correct this? I told him the story of the boy who cried wolf. I think he paid little attention. As a parent, I was paranoid, scared that his shunt was blocked again. But every time he does this, we end up wasting the Doctors valuable time, and the hospitals resources because our son has figured out that if he pretends he has head pain, he will get more attention.
Meanwhile, our younger son, is rebelling. 2.5 years of age, and uses his skull as a hammer to get attention, or what he wants, or release. He's stressed out, quick-tempered, and heading towards boxer brain. The competition between the two for my attention is wearing me thin.
How do I fix it?
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